I started 2026 with one promise to myself: every month I would host a gathering. Partly because I enjoy bringing people together, but mostly because I deeply believe in the power of community. Especially as an antidote to the feeling of overwhelm and disconnect given the state of today’s world.
Beyond the personal level, it can be a collective antidote as well. Lately, I’ve come across this phrase a lot: ‘everyone wants a village, but nobody wants to be a villager’. As it’s beautifully put in this article by the Minority Report:
“We long for belonging, for community, for the sense of a village. Yet an uncomfortable truth is becoming harder to ignore: we want all the benefits of community without accepting the responsibilities that make community possible.”
“We are paying for convenience with disconnection. We traded the messiness of community for predictability, not realizing that the mess was the thing that made community possible.”
A LinkedIn post by Priya Parker - if you haven’t read her book The Art of Gathering yet, I’d highly recommend it - proved the nudge to start hosting again in 2026.
“One of the best ways to build a community is to host something, and host something you are excited by.”
Enter a cheese party and celebration event
So why not start at home? The ideal playground to test out a new idea. Enter my January cheese party. ’Bring a unique cheese to build our cheese board together’ proved a playful, inviting way to bring friends together who didn’t know each other that well around food and stories.
In February, the gathering centered around celebration, especially celebrating the things we are proud of. Something I feel we are not doing enough. It turned into a women only special to connect a group of wonderful women in my network to celebrate something we are proud of, professionally or personally.
I noticed something else happen those evenings, besides eating lots of delicious cheese and celebrating our proud moments: stories were shared, laughter filled the room and pearls of wisdom about navigating the complexity of life were exchanged.
Turns out, ‘confelicity’ - a shared joy in each other’s achievements - actually strengthens connection. Especially during the celebration event, that connection translated into sharing lived experiences about navigating today’s world and workplace as a woman.
Besides the joy of feeling connected to the people around you, these pearls of wisdom that are shared during these conversations are such a gift for everyone present.
Community building is all about giving things a try
‘Three people is a gathering’ is a solid starting point for anyone who wants to experiment with hosting. That takes off the pressure, right?
The good thing about hosting gatherings is that you don’t have to ask anyone for permission or do something complicated to bring people together. Invite some people who you think will enjoy each other’s company, organize a space (from your living room to the public library or a café) and be intentional about why you want to host. That’s the essence of the recipe.
Accepting messiness that comes with being part of a community, creating spaces for people to meet, allowing for spontaneous connection: these are things we ourselves can do. And that’s how I hope to become a better villager this year.
How do you see your role as a villager this year?
Hi, I’m Kelly Indira Buis. With The Adaptation Company I am a strategic partner to purpose-driven orgs worldwide to help them navigate the complexity they work in and deliver what matters.
